Some Heartbreaking Truth and all the Love


Our littlest guy is almost 6 months old now. I can’t believe it was this time last year that we were first sharing the news of his surprise coming.

What a whirlwind pregnancy, birth, and life with a tiny person is!

Today, I felt like the crying never stopped (and what is it with toddlers making sure to have their meltdowns right in your face?!?) and the laundry mountain was so overwhelming so, I ignored dinner prep and spent the evening hiding from the crying in the all-consuming pile of clean clothes. Fortunately, my husband came home and jumped right in to making dinner. This afforded me a few minutes to fold all my laundry and revamp my current clothes system. Owen was hanging out on my bed watching me. I left and went to organize some clothes in the girls’ room. Two minutes later, Owen started squawking. Two minutes after that, he started full on screaming. As I worked faster to finish my project, I realized how much my perspective has shifted in the last 6 years.

When Noelle was an infant, I would have immediately tended to her needs. When Max was a baby, his cries would bring us running. With pour little baby number four, sometimes the mantra “things just need to get done” supersedes his tiny needs.

Sometimes, he has to wait a longer longer.

Sometimes, his sacred nap schedule is overlooked in the busy-ness of school pick-ups and extra-curricular activities.

Sometimes, my littlest, most vulnerable buddy is the last one to have his needs met and every time, it breaks my heart a little.

But, then I remember how much extra love this baby is surrounded by just because he’s number four and I think somewhere in the cosmic universe, it all evens out.

Owen is so so loved you guys. Not only are Zach and I smitten with his little baby face (seriously, those cheeks, those chins!), but he also has 3 other kids living here that love him so much.

Noelle loves Mr O so much that she’s constantly hovering, wanting to hold and kiss and snuggle him. The other day, she loved him so much, she somersaulted on top of him.

Max loves Owen in a way that only a four year old can. He loves to take care of the baby and to share. A few days ago, he shared a few licks of his tasty cherry lollipop with my tiny little baby because he just loves him so much. #firstfoods #oops #sugarcrash

And Miss Adelaide loves her baby brother most of all. She loves him so much, she never wants him to sleep. Addi is constantly waking him up with a big measure of pride. She loves him so much she is always trying to change his diapers too (which would be so cool if she wasn’t, you know, two #poopeverywhere).

Even if I can’t be at this little cutie’s beck and call (have you ever tried potty training a toddler with a newborn around??) I know and he knows how loved he is. Family is everything to us at FLP, even if it looks a little different than what I envisioned as a young FTM who’s kids would never cry. And this is it, this is why I take the time to pull out my camera and to set up the studio for important milestones. It's because I want to always remember these little moments and the truths of our everyday existence, even the hard ones.

xoxo

- Sarah

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